Innocence White Reminiscence Black

Long Gone Last Innocence ~ Fateful Haunting Reminiscence

I Don't Understand Him At All ...

Sometimes, it makes me wonder ... "Is he going through an age where everything seems so wrong in his eyes and everything that he does just seems wrong to other people?" It's hard to figure out a man's mind at times, especially when you are trying to figure a mind of a figure. A father figure to be exact. For the last few ... emm .. a few months, he's been acting so wrong in what he's doing. Always here and there and throwing all sorts of tantrum and really got people irritated. And guess what? It's coming from a person you called "father". I sighed thinking about him in the past and there's no different now. It's the same and it's getting a lot worse. I don't what I should do? Mother and sis have stop working on figuring him out. I've been trying to stay away from this matter and trying to act like everything is just beyond what I can do and God has the best thing coming in the end in the future if I choose not to meddle into it. 

He's been acting like this in the past and everyone just got scared of seeing him like that because, you know, something really bad and chaotic might happen. And now, everybody, and I mean EVERYBODY in the household just doesn't seem to care. He's feeling all touching and emotional about that. Hopefully he understands why people are starting to give more space to him to the point of staying away just to do so, because I don't understand him at all. Looks like all these years of people conceiving anger on him are finally taking its toll. 

I really love him dearly as a father, but he should have understood and figured out why it happens now. Because people are not going to tell him what's going on when what's been going on is happening in front of him every single time and day ... 

Tonight

Somewhere up there in Heaven
He’s waiting for my answers
He let all the doors wide open
I have never been an honest prayer

I look into the sky tonight
I can no longer see all the star lights
It’s been days, but where are they now?
Have they fallen all the way to the ground?

Have they fallen?
I wonder ...

No use walking a million miles away
If you can never find a better place to stay
You think there won’t be light to shine your way
You find it hard to believe, but you keep on praying anyway

I know I should have just let go
All the pain and hurts I kept inside
I realise, life can be so shallow
You never get the same kind of chances twice

As the sky gets darker tonight
I pray that soon, there will be some star lights
Though I lose my reflection in the shattered mirror
I can see myself on the moon that shines

I can see it
It’s blinding me ...

No use walking a million miles away
If you can never find a better place to stay
You think there won’t be light to shine your way
You find it hard to believe, but you keep on praying anyway

Once lost in the wind of change
Being left in the pouring rain
Oh, what a day I had before
They say nothing is forever
Believe in one sacred power
So, I don’t have to wonder anymore

‘Coz faith and love
Are all that matter

Let time heals the wounds and wash away the past
I lift my head high and never look back
There’s no need to grieve for things I’ve lost in the fire
And I’ll start it all over again tonight ...



P/S :
Wrote this way back during my early years in college to cheer myself up and treat old wounds ...