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Long Gone Last Innocence ~ Fateful Haunting Reminiscence

Feeling Angry ... And A Little Bit of Hope

I just finished writing about something tonight, but it turned out average. It didn't really reflect the evolution and the changes that I've shown in my previous writing before. But, I did the right thing, I guess. I just wrote it till the end. In the end, I didn't like it. It's so out of place, just like seeing a small kid scribbling. I don't like it at all. The direction that I was trying to get to with it was just not shown at all. So, after I finished writing it, I immediately put it away, didn't even bother to read it all. But, I'm still going to keep it. Someday it might be useful for me and maybe, I would get the chance to rewrite it the way I want it to be, with the rest of the writings of the past, which I think, in need of improvisation and improvement later on as well. Well, the reason I drop by my own blog here tonight, and for the second time in these few hours, is to let my mind rest in peace a little bit. I want to release my frustration and anger that I've kept so long since the first day I came home. We. humans, have the right to feel and show our emotions. For some, it is like a therapy, to let out the poison of themselves. For the rest, it might just for fun. But to me, it is more to loosing up a little bit. Since I'm not quite happy these days, it definitely takes a toll on me. That's why I made an effort to spend some quality time with myself and write something about it. As you all know, I pour out my emotions in my writings, instead of mere words said. But, it didn't turn out well. So, it made me even frustrated. But somehow, out of all this nonsense, it tells me something. I shouldn't have gone to hide myself just to not let everyone knows how I feel deep down. Maybe, it's a good thing to have it released sometimes. Because of that reason, I kept continuing to write what I just finished writing just now. Although it kinda sucked a little bit, I always believe in this talent of writing that God has given me. So, I'm gonna keep it till the day I could finally settle down and rewrite everything, turn it to what it supposed to be. Finger-crossed for that day to come around fast ...


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